The contradiction of switching

My wild outfit for my babe! Rawr!!!

:)

Interest and future, which will you choose?
Will you follow your interest and earn a normal wage, or will you go for something you are not interested in at all, but earn like Bill Gates?

Most of the people were being brain washed by their parents, to be a Doctor, Lawyer, Accountant in future, no celebrity thoughts and don't even dream of being a singer even if you have the voice of an angel. Well, I never being pumped on what I should do when I grow up, but somehow, I were placed on the Commerce track since I was 16. Not that I'm so Accounting minded, just that I knew I'm terrible in Science subjects, so I'd chosen Commerce line. During Form 4&5, I like account subject pretty much, not to say in love, but at least I can still get better result for accounting compare to Math Modern...haha! I don't know why I hated math since secondary school, even till now, maths will never be my favorite subject.Till now, I'm still in Commerce. Though I'd fail uncountable times in TARC, but somehow I felt that it will be a waste for me not to continue it as I always THINK I can do it, is just that I didn't put in much afford and always procrastinating on things and being sluggish on everything I do. 

Now, I am fumbling to make a tough decision. To choose what to major when I officially step in the life of university. I had tried my best in the entire subject that I'm having now. Sometimes I really feel that I'm not a maths person. Not to say that I can't even do questions like 1 + 1 = 2, but then, I'm just not as smart as some people in calculation. I can still pass like others, just that I might need to put trillion times of arduous effort comparing to others! My parents used to tell me that Accounting is a very good course to choose compared to others in Commerce such as Business Admin, Human Resource and etc. I'm sort of clout by this 'PROFESSIONAL' term, is like somewhat being mesmerizing and chosen this path before any further thinking.

Studying aboard is not a thing you can take it easy and just fool around like you will be forever 16 in your honeymoon year.. It is worst when you need to rely on financial helps from relatives. Worst thing ever because you've being constrained to get good results in ever single subjects and not to only PASS for the sake of pass.
I didn't blame my dad even though sometimes he is kinda type of you-must-listen-to-me, anyhow, he has nothing to do with my failure in studies, and still putting so much hopes and sacrifices towards me just to give me the best that he can. But sometimes, words which came out from his siblings are way too harsh, he needs to take the bullet for me sometimes, this make me feel the tinge of sadness, make me tears. 

I'm contradicting on switching my current major from Accounting to Marketing. I know Accounting will always be the better one compared to Marketing and other courses in Commerce, but sometimes we need to know the level of our own ability. Not every people in world are born to be doctors, lawyers, and etc. God is always fair, if not, we won't be having Indonesian maid working for us, won't be having teacher as the torch to lead us towards success. I'm not saying that I'm low to a maid level, but sometimes I really need to sit down and cogitate about what is my ability level. Can I pass all my Accounting papers when it gets tougher as it goes? Even if I have the fervid attitude in wanting to pass all subjects, and putting in heaps of efforts, but sometimes you just can't because of your ability. Marketing is way more interesting course to study, but will I triumphant in this line? Or should I choose double majoring in Marketing and Accounting, and drop it if I really can get through next time? >.<

What should I do? I don't wanna end up with full of grieve of what I'd chosen today. 
*exhale*